October 2011
2 posts
1 tag
2 tags
Congratulations!!!
Sending out a big congrats to this week’s Show of the Week: Voices Tessellate!!!
Check out her show here: http://chapmanradio.com/show?showid=203
Also, belated congrats to Selassie I Power, the show of the week for LAST week! Check out his show right here: http://chapmanradio.com/show?showid=136
Check out these awesome shows and more at http://chapmanradio.com/schedule!
September 2011
2 posts
I can't sleep! I'm too excited about new shows... →
Checked Out Our New Schedule... RIGHTTTTTTTTT... →
August 2011
1 post
New Semester! New Shows! 1st Meeting! Tonight!
Whether you’re returning to Chapman Radio, or if you’re interested in starting a show of your own, you should come by Beckman 104 tonight at 10pm for the first Chapman Radio meeting of the school year! Lots of cool peeps! And did I mention you could get your own radio show? I mean… I think that’s a pretty good deal.
July 2011
4 posts
The End.
The boy who has written the chapman radio blog for the past year, James Ramsay, has since graduated from college, and thus should pass its maintenance on to another scribe. For the same reason, he has started up a new page independent of chapman radio (but with a deep nostalgic fondness for it). It’s entitled Ecclesiastes, in honor of one of the better books of wisdom from the past few...
Clarissa explained nothing.
It’s fine, up until the existential crisis.
– Free-range chicken to a caged chicken
Desperate Reminiscence
During an open house for the philosophy department last semester, a young man raised his hand and asked, “Are classes lecture based, or more of a Symposium style?”
I replied, “[chuckle] it’s more of a Symposium, I guess”.
The “I guess” was there to qualify our Symposium as one in the colloquial sense, or as anyone with a healthy sense of self might say,...
June 2011
7 posts
Why Do They Have to Fight?
As a friend and I left the multiplex on a recent night, she turned to me and offered this review: “You know, I liked the movie, but I just get so uneasy when all the bad things happen!” I intuitively agreed with her distaste for story conflict, which is perhaps why the movie studios haven’t entrusted me with making their executive decisions for the last few years....
Workshopping
So I’ve been tinkering with my Elvis impression, and this is what I’ve got so far:
“We can’t go on together/ with suspicious minds”
…nailed it.
The Way to Go
“I went to visit a friend of mine in a hospice. It was disgusting. Old people drooling on themselves. Don’t you ever put me in a place like that,” said my Grandmother, sitting next to me on the couch. She smelled like vodka and sweat.
“Yeah, me neither. I’m wandering off into the desert when my time comes,” I replied.
My Grandmother took another sip....
Curiosity Killed the Checkbook
Minkus the cat was “unusually lethargic” the week before I returned home, such that my Mother rushed him to the cat hospital. “Well, he’s usually lethargic,” I said. “Yes,” my Mother replied, “but he wasn’t peeing”. That, of course, has the potential to become a problem, since not peeing often leads to peeing on the living room furniture....
From the Annals of a City on a Hill
“The fetus was much corrupted, yet most of those things were to be seen, as the horns and claws, the scales, etc.”
-John Winthrop, on the corpse of Mary Dyer’s stillborn baby, 1637
John Winthrop’s Actual Reaction to the Dug-Up Baby Corpse
John Winthrop: Yep, that baby definately does not have horns.
The Bedroom Pantry: Hey Nats, (an excerpt from an... →
bedroompantry:
My big pet peeve, however, is LANGUAGE in your blog! 99.9% of the time, it is witty, interesting, cute, reflective, informative and fun! But occasionally you copy something that includes a few or more expletives. I’ve made only one tiny comment about that - once - long ago. When you reblog…
On Causality
“An ancient philosophical opinion, inherited from Aristotle, is that we do not understand a thing until we know it by its causes. When the maid-servant says that ‘the cat’ broke the tea-cup, she would have us conceive the fracture in a causally explanatory way”
-William James, Some Problems of Philosophy
Maid-servant: Master...
May 2011
3 posts
Touch My Mollsaque: Movie Review: Bridesmaids →
mollyhersh:
You can’t go wrong with awkward dresses, food poisoning, Milwaukee, and the true downsides of “fuckbuddies.” The female population has been waiting for a movie where the characters can be just as crude and hilarious as their male counterparts, and Kristin Wiig, Maya Rudolph, and pals did not…
Whose Win is It, Anyway?
A smirk pokes through when I think back to a game I fancied in high school. It usually took place in General Health, though any teacher could start a round if their class needed a cold slap in the face. It began with them sharing some factoid in the vein of:
“You know, the statistics don’t lie. 2 out of 3 of you will not make it to college”, or,
“All the...
April 2011
9 posts
Gentrify This
You know this street- every city has one. It’s got wide brick sidewalks and three-story brownstones and so many vintage bicycles tied to the lamp-posts that you’re just waiting for an army of people to come out of the storefronts sniffing their own farts out of wine glasses[1] and then asking you to hold them while they hand-roll a cigarette.
Of course, you go half a mile in any...
How I Got These Sweets
I went in for an MRI and the lady behind the desk asked if I had any metal in my body. I told her I have a titanium plate in my forhead but she didn’t believe me, so I headbutted her. She passed out on her keyboard, so I sorted out the candy from her bowl, put the miniature A&W Root Beer candies in my jacket, and just left.
“James,” you may say, “that’s just...
James Ramsay: an Exposé on America
mollyhersh:
An American Hero.
Flag.
Pizza.
Eagle.
The Love of Your Life
What you imagine she’s thinking as she glances in your direction from across the quad:
“Oh, there he is! So artfully disheveled, he definately doesn’t pay attention to looking that way, it just happens. I would go talk to him, but he’s so enveloped in that book. Gosh, a reader. Everyone else is addicted to their technologies, but not ____. He’s a real Renaissance...
An actual pop song I just wrote that I'm willing...
You think you know me,
But you ain’t got a clue.
I been growin up,
Just like grown ups do.
So before you run around talkin’ crazy,
Listen up Pal, because I’m talkin’ to you…
That’s right I’m talkin’ to you.
Little guitar ditty. Someone lightly taps a wammy bar.
I’ve gone and read some books,
And done a bit of thinkin’,
I learned my times tables,
You were under tables drinkin’,
So baby wait,...
a six word story
Boys can go longer- SEX! …nevermind.
Re: Best Ever Substitute for Back Pain
Dear Chapman Radio,
As someone of Asian ethnicity who suffers from koro, I found your tongue-in-cheek reference distasteful and mishandled (no pun intended). Having someone hold your penis for days at a time is anything but pleasant, especially during the junior high years. Junior high students, as we all know, are ruthlessly judgmental. It was enough of an issue discerning which sneakers would...
Best Ever Substitute for Back Pain
“Some Asian cultures have very low back-pain rates, but many people there do suffer from koro, a condition in which men become afflicted by the feeling that their penises are retracting into their bodies. The treatment involves asking a trusted family member to hold the penis twenty-four hours a day until the anxiety goes away.”
David Brooks, The Social Animal, p 151, 3rd paragraph....
March 2011
5 posts
Things That Drive Me Crazy:
Lists
Suiphagia
i.e. self-swallowing
Rod's Liquor
For the past two years, I’ve walked the same mile to school, past that craftsman style lodge on Lemon that I’m pretty sure is a nut-house, past the unassuming ground-level apartment with a neon bar peeking out from behind the front door, which may double as an underground bunny ranch, and past the American Legion which perpetually looks like a Quinceañera with a hangover.
Then there’s...
Just, everything about this.
http://www.desmoinesregister.com/article/20110227/NEWS/102270332/Bonaparte-man-s-chicken-lays-whopper-an-egg
the truth is that TV tennis is to live tennis...
“Roger Federer as Religious Experience”, David Foster Wallace
February 2011
3 posts
Something Worth Finishing
Over the summer, my coffee table was littered with collections of short stories. My Mother asked, “James, why do you like short stories?”, to which I paused long enough to fool her into anticipating a genuine, thoughtful response, before I replied, “because I can reach the ending before you have to refill the bowl of M&Ms”.
I’ve thought a bit more about the question, and my...
I understand Gail Collins' concern that House...
January 2011
6 posts
A Trade Agreement
“We want to sell you… all kinds of stuff”. –President Obama, in a Press Conference with Chinese President Hu Jintao
Tired of spending all day sitting at a desk, programming innovative new software? Disillusioned with working on new alternative energy products? Bored with the hours a day spent in advanced schools, keeping up that useless ranking as the world’s number one nation in...
A Belgian Dip
If you’re like me, you were under the assumption that the world was sans conflict, just one big happy flower field. As Bill O’Reilly aptly notes, the tide goes out, the tide comes in. But alas, The New Yorker dropped a bomb on us this week with a report that Belgium is on the brink of disintegration, having failed since June to form a federal government. Notes Bart De Weaver, head...
Just Give it a Little Tappy
With college graduation looming ahead and the future looking grim, many of us are facing down the inevitable problem: why are we not having sex like the movies made it seem we would? Also, we’re terrified about our financial future, and how we’ll make a living (perhaps the women can smell the fear on us. (If only fear smelled like Axe Bodyspray! (Maybe I should use “Fear: by...
Something to Feel Guilty About
In magazine interviews from time to time, the question is handed, “What’s your guilty pleasure?” to which the person usually replies, “Dan Brown novels”, or “cashmere sweaters”. Which begs the question- have these people never heard of pornography?
In the late Nineteenth Century, paperbacks surely filled the satchels of women about town, and the stuff inscribed on their pages-...
Stuff You Should Know.
The Baby Boomers have been known to remark, “kids these days…”. If you plugged that into the No Fear: Shakespeare translator, the “…” would come out, roughly, to something like “are real dumbasses”, which is probably true. For one, we use No Fear: Shakespeare. But also because we just don’t know a lot of the things that, over time, have formed the canon of significant stuff worth knowing, like...
The cool pronunciation is two-thousand-one-one. ...
December 2010
17 posts
liesandstatistics:
I have no idea why I haven’t posted this before.
John Vanderslice & John Darnielle go skateboarding.
And by, “go skateboarding” I mean, “attempt skateboarding as good as they can which is not very good until they get told by the cops to leave.”
Mariah Carey gave me life... led me out into the...
Cruising.
You rode the exercise bike for half an hour today. That’s 7.5 miles. You pushed it. That’s the farthest you’ve travelled all week. Absolutely, nowhere.
Taylor Swift- you know too well of love's austere...
Gold? Frankincense?! Myrrh?!?!...... All he...
The Cheap Stuff.
iTunes just posted (as far as I know, “just” is accurate) an electronic bargain bin called “69¢ Songs”. First of all, that’s gross. But, number three on their list is “Butterfly” by Crazy Town. So, everyone in my list of e-mail contacts, I’m gonna make your legs shake cus you make me go crazy.